Why people are choosing collaborative divorce

Divorce is an emotional, social, spiritual, and financial journey that includes a legal event as one step along the way. Just as marriage is much more than a piece of paper, and the process of divorce is far more than simply signing the final agreement.

Strong feelings can get in the way:
For most people, getting divorced involves loss on many levels. These can include loss of control, loss of a dream, loss of trust, loss of stability, loss of a best friend, loss of financial security, loss of connection to shared friends and community, and loss of identity as a married person, and more. 

Powerful feelings of anger and grief as well as anxious thoughts about the future are normal. Communication can be difficult. Many people feel ruled by their emotions and that can keep them from making decisions about the future. 

Coaches are trained to teach you and your spouse helpful communication and self-management skills which are necessary in your settlement discussions, and in your post-divorce co-parenting.  Strategies for communication around decision making and problem solving are critical to ensuring that your needs and interests are clearly expressed.

Coaches help by identifying the underlying needs and wants, to facilitate the negotiations; by teaching co-parenting skills; by teaching and modeling communication skills, problem-solving skills; by helping you develop a roadmap for future relationships within the new family structure; by being a resource into the future as issues arise.  

Coaches help attorneys by providing an overview of the emotional issues which are affecting the clients’ behavior or position; by consulting when there is an impasse in the case; by depathologizing the divorce process; by providing a safe place for clients to deal with emotions and volatility during the legal process; by focusing on the interest and needs of the family as a whole; by being the voice of the children or parent when necessary.